Sonic's Letters
by Beyond an Anomaly
Summary: Messages from the Blue Blur himself and all his friends! (And enemies...) NOTE: Different title, same Fanfic. Originally Dear Fanfiction-Sonic Edition. Enjoy! :) And another note: Thank you to all who have reviewed, followed, favorited, or even simply read! Means a lot. :)
1. From: Sonic, Tails and Knuckles

Hey guys!

I bet you know who THIS is! Anyway, thanks for supporting the Sonic Team over the years; we really wouldn't be in business without you guys. The stories you guys write and all those cool drawings are just awesome! But...uh...there's just a thing or two that I find _just a little _weird...

Well...I'm straight. The whole thing between me and Tails is a little...out there while that thing with me and Shadow...well, I won't go into that that much.

And second, quit making me sound all helpless to EGGMAN! I've been beating him for over twenty years; I know what I'm doing!

That being said, thanks again!

-Sonic

P.S.: Mario is just a friend too. Just. A friend.

* * *

Hi Sonic fans!

I don't have that much to say besides thank you for liking us for so long! While I'm here, though, there's something I'd like to say...

Cosmo is dead. Quit making me and her hold hands at a dock while eating the same ice cream or...whatever. It's just really...weird. And it's not even that, but she's a plant! A PLANT! I just can't go out with a dead plant who thought she did every little thing wrong. I mean, do what you want, but I just prefer that whole Tailsmo/Cails thing to end.

And I'm NOT useless! Try playing Star Fox and rescuing Slippy every twenty seconds. THEN we'll debate.

Just keep those things into mind! Thank you all SO much!

-Tails

P.S.: I am, in fact, a boy who happens to have a high-pitched voice. I'll go through puberty eventually, I swear.

* * *

To the STH fanbase,

I do things besides protecting the Master Emerald and yelling at people, you know. I read, play pinball, and have a Twitter acount. I have a social life. That being said, I'm also not that careless with the emerald and Rouge hasn't gotten away with it YET!

Anyway, there is no WAY I'll ever be in a relationship with Tikal. It's actually impossible; I think she's like, in heaven with Chaos or something like that. And do you have to pair me with every echidna in the series? Well, I suppose it's not as bad as those stories of me, Sonic, and/or Tails "having feelings" for each other. The least you can do is stop THAT. Why? Because you made it obvious that there are PLENTY of girls to choose from...

So...yeah. Not much else I can say.

-Knuckles

P.S.: The Master Emerald is a magical rock. Not a god. Just so you know...


	2. From: Amy, Cream and Big

OMG, like HI GUYS!

I love you guys SOOOOOOOOO much! Almost more than Sonic! (JK, by the way.) ;P

So, like, I just LOVE how many people there are out there who think that Sonic and I should get together! But I have noticed that there are SOME people out there who think I'm almost as annoying as Princess Peach and Slippy Toad! Shame on you guys! :(((

I mean, this thing with me and my little Sonic is serious! We 3 each other, and it's gonna be like that for a very long time! If not than forever! Not with Tails! Not with Shadow! But with Sonic! My sweet little loving snuggly wuggly little Sonny-Boo! (Especially not with Shadow...) O_oll

THX GUYS! XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

-Amy

P.S.: In case if you were wondering, I have an invisible back-pack that makes everything inside it invisible. That's how I can get the Piko-Piko Hammer to pop out of no where.

* * *

Hello everyone!

You are all so sweet! It's so wonderful that there are so many people out there who like us! Truly, it is! Just one thing, though...

I have a great mother! She's not terrible! I mean, she respects me for who I am! I mean...oh, just a moment. I'll be right back...

You know what, forget what I said. Apparently "shaddup" is a bad word to her and I was caught saying it to Cheese; but "Chao! Chao! Chao!" Golly, that's...

Oh, screw it. That freaking demon spawn has gotten on my last damn nerve...

Well, thank you all for reading and having a super lovely day!

-Cream

P.S.: My mommy won't be reading this, will she?

* * *

Deer Fanfikshun...

i reely wesh u gis wood bee neyser 2 me. i no u gis may bee enoyed bye how i speyund oll my tyme with froggy...butt froggy & i is grate freins. we is alwas so tyt with eech uhther. nd uh...uh...

wate...were froggy?

FROGGY!

y u no kum? y u no reespawnd? kan u nott here me?

FROGGY! FROGGY!

wut abowt now? dat lowder?

-Big

P.S.: ef ennywon c froggy, let me no.


	3. From: Shadow, Rouge and Omega

Oh, do I REALLY have to write this?!

Ugh, I really don't like you guys, and let me tell you why. I'll say it straight up, and if you didn't know that I don't care what others think about me, you're already an idiot.

I have three problems with you guys:

Allow me to state the following for the record: Maria is a human, NOT a hedgehog. She never came back from the dead as one, she's never been turned into one, and I might as well go ahead and mention that I've never gotten married and had children with her while she was in this state. Seriously, guys. She's twelve. I would never even think of going out with her, and she's dead anyway. Sucks, but it's true.

Why do you guys always put me with Amy? She's not THAT pretty. She's a love-crazy pyschopath who seems to stalk Sonic and record his every move on a minutely basis. Besides, we've only talked, like, twice. That, and again...she's twelve. I'd rather not break the law.

You can forget the last two if you swear with your life that you'll forever remember this one: I. Am. Not. Sonic's. Lover. I'm not too sure why that was so hard for Sonic to say.

Yeah, like you'll actually take this into mind when you draw a picture of me making out with Sonic.

-Shadow (Who is NOT an emo...)

Oh, and P.S.: If you think I'm such a jerk, try getting your family, home, and practically fifty years of your life taken away from you within a day. Just saying.

* * *

Oh, hello, readers!

Oooh, my first Fanfiction letter...what to write, what to write...

Well, for starters, I might as well say that I'm in fact NOT a stripper.

...

Wow. That's actually it.

Well, thanks for reading, I guess...

-Rouge

Oh. P.S.: By all means, keep up that Shadow vs. Knuckles fight over me. It's made this site my favorite past-time...

* * *

TO THE EARTHLY SPECIES OF HUMANITY,

THE FOLLOWING HAS COME TO MY IMMERSION; THIS SAID INFORMATION REGARDS THE AUTHORICAL PROFESSIONALS WHO PARTICIPATE IN THE AFFAIRS OF LITERATURE ON THIS WEBSITE.

YOU HAVE CLEARLY SHOWN NO REGARDS TO MY RIGOROUS ENDEAVORS; I HAVE RETRIEVED THIS INFORMATION WITH SOMEWHAT OF SHOCK. HOW COME YOU HAVE NOT FOUND IT IN YOURSELVES TO RETRIEVE YOUR WRITING UTENSTILS AND YOUR ELECTRONIC DEVICES AND WRITE ABOUT THE DANGEROUS, EXTREME MISSIONS THAT CONSIST OF MY EVERYDAY? WHY-WHAT ARE YOU STATING? I AM TIRESOME TO YOU?! WHY-1001101011101011011010010111 01010101

*#%#*$( %$&#( #*$I&^#^((*))_!* **&#*&^$%$&*& ^#(* ($*&

PRESS CTRL ALT DEL TO RESTART.

...

_E-123 Omega's transmission chip has blown a fuse. Please stand-by until further notice. But seriously, though, write more stories with this guy in it._


	4. From: Vector, Espio and Charmy

To the readers of Fanfiction,

Frankly, unlike pretty much everyone else here, I don't have any complaints. I guess the only thing is that I miss Mighty and Ray too. I don't know where they are, so...yeah. Don't think I WANTED them to leave. I didn't. Oh, and one more thing:

Espio and I are, in fact, F-R-I-E-N-D-S. Seriously, what is up with you guys thinking all of us guys on the Sonic Team are gay?

And me? WITH CHARMY?! Geez, what is wrong with you people?!

So, yeah, no complaints.

Sincerely, (sorta),

Vector

P.S.: Why no, I HAVEN'T found the computer room yet; quit asking!

* * *

Oh, good day, Fanfiction.

So, you're the ones who have written about me and Vector...getting friendly with each other. Isn't that just grand. How wonderful. I'll also suspect that you're also the ones who wrote about me with Knuckles and Charmy, correct? Right, right. That's what I thought. That's creative. Stunning. ESPECIALLY pleasing to my eyes, yes. It DEFINITELY doesn't want me to figure out where you live, walk into your room and throw a ninja star at your hard drive so you'd have to spend months saving up the money to buy a new device to write your wonderful Fanfics on, even though it would be pointless since I deleted your account by hacking  
into your old computer before I destroyed it or anything. No, not at all. They're all just as wonderful as watching a baby penguin surrounded by leopard seals.

Continue on with your...excellent work.

-Espio

P.S.: It's not like I know where you sleep or anything...nor would it matter if I did...

* * *

Typing!

Type type type, typity type type type...lalalalalalalala...

RANDOM TYPING!

sjhdkdfh;eileuhz9p8347b46N#^^&($&^ #($iyrieuyfusbN(jdfhskdgfhN& *{{p[[pweoiuwoeu2863iujadslyiduyds utdfnr86wnr6x3x6732n6n8738n9 376874m8,0[p{){{PP(!* &^ &^#Uoudskdgsldiuo* !^ &^I#UU8 &&#YGDHUDYDE80894834p3545.i4545====+! U(! QGGDtIY#EI**#E&&#*$&*&$*&$&udhGkjhdfkdhfkdjfhkdsg WOO! THE FUN JUST NEVER STOPS!

-Charmy


	5. From: Silver

**_Hello, readers of this Fanfic old and new! I've decided to continue this Fanfic and group up the once lost chapters until we come to where we left off...which is this chapter! I hope you keep enjoying this story, review if you wish, and for past followers of this Fanfic who decided to come back, I thank thee!_**

* * *

Oh! Hey Fanfiction!

Wow! You guys are actually pretty awesome! Pairing me up with Blaze, like, all the time, almost always making me sound cool, calling me a hero...wow! From what I heard from everyone else, I was actually expecting the worst, but-

*reads a Fanfic that consists of he, Sonic and Shadow...you know*

I...um...wow.

-Silver the Hedgehog

P.S.: You guys sure are descriptive...

And another P.S.: Call my hair a plant one more time...


	6. From: Blaze

To the writers of Fanfiction,

Like Silver said, I don't have many complaints. He and I seem to have a very large fanbase and such, but here's the thing...do we...know each other? I don't quite remember him that well...does he know something I don't? ...Or do YOU know something I don't?! Huh? DO YOU?! Why do people shield me from all these things?! Why doesn't anyone in my kingdom just TELL me what's going on?! WHY?! Care to answer that for me? CARE TO-1000110101110101010010111010 1

YOU LOST EVERYTHING. WAY TO GO GENIUS. 404 HAMSTERS NOT FOUND.

...

_Well, it seems that Blaze has blown a fuse too. Oddly, however, she's not a robot; she probably just went crazy._


	7. From: Jet

Heh, what's up?

Well, I shouldn't complain, nor will I, about all the fans I know I have. And why should I blame them? I mean, who could honestly resist the Legendary Wind Master, who has awesome green hair, a boss piece of Extreme Gear, and a godly presence? I wouldn't blame myself neither, as I have every reason to love my biggest fan: me. Me, whom everyone thinks should be Wave the Swallow's idol, (and I am!). Me, who can win in a race against Sonic the Hedgehog any time, any day. Me, who is so awesome, he-

Okay, okay, Wave! I'll stop it! Just stop playing that foul music about trucks and women you call country!

And yes, I know I'm awesome.

-Jet the Hawk

P.S.: Okay, Wave. STOP IT.


	8. From: Wave

**_Two chapters? IN ONE DAY?! Why not? Enjoy, awesome readers!-BAA_ Productions**

* * *

Hello, readers everywhere!

So, it appears that you've read Jet's letter. Stupid, right? I mean, how he just goes on and on about me _liking _him? Ha! That's SOOOO not true! I mean, it's not like I stare at him while he's sleeping or send him anonymous love letters or anything! HAHAHAHAHAHA...yeah. I...I don't like him. He's...not...attractive...

-Wave the Swallow

P.S.: He's...not...


	9. From: Storm

_**Wait-over 1,000 views?! Dang you guys are awesome! Cheers, mi amigos!- BAA Productions**_

* * *

Hi.

So, um...wow. I just lost my creativity. Seriously. I don't really know what to say to you guys besides...well, I don't like Knuckles that much, and...uh...huh. Maybe I just need to think this over...uh...

-Storm the Albatross

(P.S. from author: I actually had NO idea what to write for him.)

* * *

**_Yeah, because this chapter's so lame, expect another chapter later._**


	10. From: Metal Sonic

**_Well, here it is. I think this one's A LOT better than the one earlier. Enjoy! P.S.: BTW, if you have any other character suggestions or suggestions in general, feel free to leave a review! I'd love to see your ideas! Now-*flies with rainbow* ADVENTURE!_**

* * *

Dear Fanfiction,

An author once had a thought in their head, and thought that their Fanfic should be read about me and Sonic, "getting busy" real quick... and now that author is dead.

-Metal Sonic

P.S.: I hate limericks as much as I hate Sonic and you stupid humans. Deal with it.


	11. From: Eggman

To the humans who actually like Sonic,

If you are reading this, it means that I don't get you. Why? Well, get a load of this:

For starters, you think that pairing me with Sonic is a good idea. Second, you think that pairing me with my own creations is even better. THOSE ARE OUTRAGEOUSLY TERRIBLE IDEAS. Third, you still make me sound like a loser against Sonic and his posse. Why, just WHY do you torture me so, Fanfiction? I haven't _directly _tried to destroy your world in quite some time, so there should be no reason for all this nonsense!

But wait-there are some people who _do_ like me who aren't Orbot and Cubot, right? Yes! There are! You know what I have to say to that? Well...

You know what they say, the more the merrier!

-Dr. Ivo Robotnik (What the heck is up with "Eggman" anyway?)

P.S.: And me? WITH BOWSER?! No. Just...no...


	12. From: Black Doom

Humanity.

Allow me to tell you a story.

Once upon a time, there was a human who was walking down the street. He was smiling and acting very foolishly, not quite recognizing the incalculable amount of sins he committed in his lifetime. Therefore, since he was so naive of his sins, the Black Arms killed him. Then they ate his body for nourishment.

The end.

I hope you enjoyed it.

-Black Doom

P.S.: Unlike the purple chameleon, we DO know where you sleep...and that DOES matter to us...


	13. From: Mephiles

_**Hey guys! Sorry I couldn't update yesterday; I forgot. Anyway, 50 reviews?! OMG, thank you guys! I hope you guys keep reading and thank you for the awesome suggestions and inputs!-BAA Productions**_

_**P.S.: Thanks to Duskzilla for the idea of this character...**_

* * *

Where to BEGIN with you mortals!

Who do you think I am?! Apparently, you think of me as a "hottie" and a "mysterious love interest"! LOVE IS NONEXISTENT! Therefore, WHY do you CONTINUALLY insist on pairing me with the likes of that stupid Silver and that traitor Shadow?! ESPECIALLY that traitor _Shadow?! _And you WONDER why we evil-doers wish to destory you all? Oh, and Elise? Me. WITH ELISE?! Are you asking for hellfire?! Again: do you know who I am? I am great and powerful! I AM IMMORTAL! I AM-

Wait-what do you mean nothing in Sonic 2006 actually happened?! I'm being told this NOW?!

-Mephiles the Dark

P.S.: Well, since I don't exist, there's no point in finishing this letter, now is there?


	14. From: GUN

Members of Fanfiction,

We understand your frustration with us when it comes to life or death situations in the Sonic Universe. We also know our mistake with killing Maria Robotnik for no apparent reason. However, at G.U.N., we strive to protect our people by all means necessary...don't try to ask us what those means are at the moment. Also, the Commander of G.U.N. also asks you to stop writing the stories of him being the mentally deranged bad guy who wants to hold Shadow or Sonic in prison or some other form of hostage...even though we know he's somewhat mentally deranged.

-The Guardian Unit of Nations

P.S.: Think of it this way: we help make Sonic look cooler by making ourselves look bad.


	15. From: Gerald and Maria Robotnik

_**Okay, so. I don't know HOW many people wanted this character, but here it is. You know who you are if you thought of this idea; there are just too many to list.-BAA Productions**_

_**P.S.: This letter is actually personally my favorite one, and I think the longest...enjoy!**_

* * *

Hello, Fanfiction.

Well, it's been a little over a decade since we were both killed off the series, so it's quite nice to know that there are some people out there who, um...like us. But there are a few things, though...

First off, we're underestimated to say the very least. If it wasn't for either one of us, Shadow wouldn't be alive or even exist. We heard you like Shadow. Therefore, sending us "Thank You" cards and at least giving us some honorable mention would be a nice option for you to make at the moment.

Second, we understand that the Professor sounds evil on paper, but if you lost your grand-daughter and greatest creation along with thousands of innocent lives to the government you worked for, wouldn't you go berserk too? If he really was evil, EVERYONE would be dead. Seriously, kids. Seriously.

Third, we might as well go ahead and say that Maria and Shadow will NEVER go out with each other; they didn't like each other _that_ much. And finally, we should finally address that we're both still dead here. Don't make it seem as though we're still alive in present-day, because, you know...we aren't. Yet, revival stories can make sense if done right...we guess.

-Gerald and Maria Robotnik

P.S.: And who was the numbskull who thought up the idea that Eggman created Shadow?

Well?

Why yes, Maria, I know it's rude to call them numbskulls, but come on! If I had hair, I'd be pulling it out right now!

...

Point proven, Professor. Point proven.


	16. From: Orbot and Cubot

**_Oh wow! We're almost at 100 reviews! This is amazing! THANK YOU!-BAA_**

**_P.S.: Thanks to Random Person for this idea..._**

**_And another P.S.: I just published a new story called "Sonic Legends: Cobalt". Check it out if you want and tell me what you think! Other than that, keep enjoying the story! :)_**

* * *

Salutations, Fanfiction.

Yeah, howdy!

...Cubot, why are you...oh, never mind. We just wanted to thank you for your appreciation for our series and-

YEEHAW! WE LOOOVE YOU RASCALS!

Erm...Cubot, did your voice chip go out again?

Probably, partner.

I...alright. Well, we don't know what else we can say, so...we...oh, Cubot, what are you doing now?

Roundin' up these varmits, partner!

...You mean the Wisps? We don't catch those anymore...remember?

Guess not!

So...you're really chasing the stuffed animals of them?

YEEEEEEHAW!

*sigh*Well, sorry you had to read this. I promise I will get that Egghead to straighten him out...FOR THE MILLIONTH TIME...

-Orbot and Cubot

P.S.: Help me...please. My IQ keeps dropping helping this poor confused "cowboy".


	17. From: Sally

**Oh my...my...100 REVIEWS! *trumpet fanfare * I can't thank you guys enough! Anywho, on with the letters! And to celebrate this joyous day, I have brought forth yet another highly requested character, so thanks to those who suggested this character too! (Maria still had the most requests with this one close in line!-BAA**

* * *

Oh, hi.

Allow me to start with the following question: do you know who I am? Honestly. I'm the first girlfriend Sonic ever had...his first female friend...coming to you? Yeah, that's me, the "idiotic squirrel" who started it all. Well, if it wasn't for me, Sonic probably wouldn't have started on his adventures! So there! That, and we ARE going out now, thank you! None of this "Amy" nonsense. Who is this "Amy" anyway?! ...Oh don't tell me it's that chick who's been staking-out at the castle for the past four months sending me emails with every colorful happy word under the sun! Oh, COME ON!

...

...Oh, look! Another hate email! Allow me to read it aloud!

Hmm..."Stupid Sally,"

How clever!

"I hate you! So does my snuggly wuggly Sonny-boo! He LOOOOOOOVES ME and not YOU! This isn't the last you hear from ME! Spankety Spankety Spankety!-Anonymous"

Ha! Quoting Porky Minch, are we "Anonymous"? Well two can play at THAT game!

Now if you may excuse me...*takes out graphic novels* I have some meat to tenderize!

Spankety Spankety Spankety indeed...

-Sally Acorn

P.S.: You're dead Amy Rose...or should I say "anonymous"...


	18. From: Mega Man (Wait---WHAT!)

So...wait. Sonic and I are gonna be in a comic together?

...

...

...

...Why?

-Mega Man

P.S.: Just...why?

* * *

I remember reading about this and this was my legitimate response. "...What? Why...?" And I kinda had to rush this one since I've been a little busy lately; I thought it was...um, a topic to be addressed all the same. Look it up if you think it's not true...because in some way...it is. -BAA Productions


	19. From: The Deceased

Wow, that's a lot of people.

Anyway, allow us to state one thing for the record: we're dead. If you REALLY want us alive, be like Shadow in Sonic Heroes and come up with a reason on how we survived our fates; it's quite hard to survive self-destruction and sacrifices, you know. Also, for the living's sake, DON'T pair us up with the living; it's creepy for a living being to date a ghost, right? What's it like being alive, anyway? Satisfying? Yeah.

It better be.

-Everyone in STH who died over the years (E-102 Gamma, Tikal, Chaos, Emerl, Cosmo, among others)

P.S.: Gerald and Maria got their own letter, huh? Well, that's just _dandy..._

And P.S. again: How can we write this letter if we're dead, you ask? Good question. You guys tend to ask A LOT of good questions. Therefore, this is something to figure out on your own, dear _"fan"._


	20. From: An Angered Robot

**_G'day, mates and matettes!_**

**_Sorry I didn't update yesterday; I had some stuff due, got exhausted by running nearly a mile every day this week, distraction in the form of Toddlers and Tiaras...you know how it is. Anyway, I'm back with more! And to make up for this late update, two new stories have been created just for you! One: an update for Sonic Legends (Chapter 2, by the way!) and Two: a new Sonic parody called Speed of Sue. Maybe this IS Sonic Month over here after all! XD_**

**_Enjoy, and thanks as always for the many ideas and great support!_**

**_-BAA_**

* * *

Dear murderer,

You don't respect me enough. Seriously. You think I WANTED to imprison woodland creatures inside of me? Cuz I didn't. Well, apparently that fat guy did. Nor did he really care what I thought. Oh, and that "stupid drone" you killed last week? That was my brother. We were made by the same fat dude, so he was indeed my brother. YOU. KILLED. MY BROTHER! You helped that hedgehog KILL. MY. B-R-O-T-H-E-R! And you guys find NOTHING wrong with that?! God, I can only imagine how those Goombas over at that Mushroom Kingdom feel, getting trampled by some thirty-some-odd-year-old "plumber" ever freaking day. Oh, and also those guys that shoot at that fox. No, not Tails, that other guy…those British monkeys. And honestly, what's so bad about those goblins? You know who I'm talking about! Those creepy, undead thingies that attack you for no apparent reason and keep you from the ultimate power of courage, strength, and…that other thing while there's a princess in distress and a warlock out to murder you? Why attack those guys too with your sword to possibly make money in order to buy supplies, masks, weapons, and other items necessary to complete your adventure?

…Oh.

Anyway, no matter what, you're still a murderer.

I hope you enjoy that chili-dog and eternal glory, jerk.

-The first Badnik/Robot you ever came across

P.S.: So wait-you mean to tell me you DON'T get arrested for killing MY BROTHER?! You guys are just so…so…AUGH!


	21. From: Marine

**_Thanks to xiXToxicXix (Gosh, I hope I got that name right...) and Random Person for the idea of this character!_**

* * *

G'day, Fanfic readas!

Croiky, look at cha! What a sight! There must be a ton of you! No! Two tons! No! More like over 9,000! How have ya been? I've been great, thanks fa askin'! I've been with the Coconut Crew here, readin' ya many stories, and we gotta say…uh…er…

Where are we?

Believe us, ya doin' a bonza job here, but without us…Blaze wouldn't have a kingdom, right? She wouldn't have an adorable, spunky shiela at er side, right? RIGHT?!

…Oh. Heh heh. Sorry…did I snap there?

Anyway, yeah. I've been bonza. Simply ripper…yeah. Heh heh…croiky, I made all this awkwad fa ya, didn't I?

Wait a minute…

Are all the red lines I'm seein' on this here screen a good thing…or a bad thing?

Hmm…

-Marine the Raccoon

P.S.: It really would be bonza if I was in more of ya stories and-WHADDYA MEAN "BONZA" ISN'T SPELLED RIGHT, MISTA COMPUTA?! Are YOU Australian?!


	22. From: Chris Thorndyke

**_Thanks to those who thought of this idea! (Lots to list.)_**

**_-BAA_**

**_P.S.: If you like this character, I'd LOVE to talk with you...in private._**

**_And another P.S.: 20 FAVORITES?! WHAT?! _**

* * *

So…um…hey!

I don't get why you guys hate me so much and-*slap*-h-hey! Stop that!

And just saying, I'm kinda cool-looking, since I bear a big resemblance to Sora from Kingdom-OW! S-Sonic! Quit punching me! I thought we were best friends!

W-Whaddya mean we aren't?! And whaddya mean I'm the most hated Sonic character of all time?!

Well, yes, I know I'm easy to hate, but I was meant to represent the younger genera-OW! Quit using your homing attack! Ow! Ow! OW!

-Chris Thorn-OUCH!

P.S.: Fine, fine! I'll go sit in the corner! Just STOP KICKING ME IN THE SHIN!


	23. From: The Forgotten Ones

Thanks to KoopalingFan, Connie the Hedgecat, among many others for the idea of these characters!

* * *

To Fanfiction,

We know we haven't been in any games in a while; for some of you, we were in games before you were alive. Just because of that, doesn't mean that you shouldn't COMPLETELY forget about us like everyone else has. Please...we beg of you...we just want some attention; we've been crying our eyes out over our lack of love since the late 90's! DON'T BE HATERS THAT MAKE OUR TEARS!

-the "Forgotten Ones" (Nack, Bean, Mighty, Ray, among others)

P.S.: Cameos just aren't enough. They really, really, REALLY aren't.


	24. From: Princess Elise

Thanks to...uh...geez I can't remember...but whoever you are, thanks for this idea!

Also, I can't believe that there are almost 200 reviews to this thing! Wow! I have no idea what to say besides...well, you know.

-BAA

* * *

Hello, citizens of Earth!

Yes, I know. You hate me. Yet I'll be honest; I don't get why!

Did I kiss Sonic? Yes.

Did I get kidnapped five times in a matter of two days? Sure.

Do I look like a rejected Final Fantasy character? ...I suppose so.

But that doesn't matter! I saved Sonic's life! Even though I don't really remember it, I looked it up! So I must have...

...

Wait a minute...who's that blond girl with the blue headband?

Why is she carrying a baseball bat?

Why is she telling me that I "gave all human girls in the Sonic series a bad name"?

...AND WHY IS SHE TRYING TO KILL ME?!

-Princess Elise

P.S.: PLEASE! HELP! THIS DERANGED TWELVE-YEAR-OLD IS TRYING TO KILL ME! SOMEONE GO GET


	25. From: Nazo

We've reached 200 reviews! WOW! *trumpet fanfare*

Thanks guys! And let's see...I'm unsure who reviewer 100 was, but thanks to Icy Fire 7 for being the owner of the 200th review! *hands out cookies to everyone*

But you are here for a letter, correct? Well, you know what they say, the more the merrier!

-BAA

P.S.: Thanks to Duskzilla for another cool idea!

* * *

So.

Let me get this straight...

You consider me a Sonic character even though I've only appeared once in a Japanese trailer of Sonic X, think I'm "da kewlest baddie EVA", have written about me a limitless amount of times, pair me with everyone including the likes of Sonic and Shadow, and you don't even know who the heck I am?

...

...

...

...I think I can live with that. Keep it up, you pathetic mortals.

-Nazo the Bystander

(P.S. from author: Frankly, I figured out who this guy was from the request. Thanks again, Duskzilla!)


	26. From: Sonic the Werehog (and Chip)

**_Thanks to Slick the Wolf for this idea! (I believe that someone else thought up this character as well...you know who you are if you did.)_**

* * *

**__**Uh...well, hey guys!

It's me again!

I'm not that sure why I'm writing this, but...well, here I am! Well, maybe I do...you see, I'm not sure what it is...it's like I've been feeling kinda weird lately and-*looks out window*

...Oh no. OH. FREAKING. NO. The moon! NO!

*starts changing...*

It's happening! It's happening again! NO!

...

...

...

...UGH.

WHY DID MY VOICE GET LOWER? AND MY HANDS ARE SO...BIG! I FEEL SLOWER...AND STRONGER...AND...HATED.

QUICK! CHIP! DO SOMETHING!

Use the Nunchuck to move around and press A to jump! Anyone have any chocolate? Chocolate! CHOCOLATE! CHOOOOOOOCCCCOOOOLATTTTEEE!

-Sonic the Werehog and Chip the Flying Chipmunk/Light Gaia

P.S.: CHIP! I CAN BARELY WALK AROUND! I FEEL SO SLOW! HELP ME OUT HERE!

CHOCOLATECHOCOLATECHOCOLATEC HOCOLATECHOCOLATE

AUGH!

(P.S. from author: Yeah...I never played Sonic Unleashed all the way through, so I don't quite know much about the more precise perks about the game. I hope this was a good interpretation, though! :))


	27. From: Sonia and Manic

G'day, readers!

I feel that I've been rushing some of these letters, and for that, I do apologize. However, I'd still love to thank you guys for your support, along with the several who thought of these guys! (Seriously, why didn't I think of this letter before?) Anywho, on with the Sonic stuff!

-BAA

P.S.: Speed of Sue-A Sonic Parody has been updated! (If thou art interested...)

And another P.S.: 20 followers...wow...never thought that these letters were THAT super, but gracias nonetheless. :)

* * *

Hello everyone!

Well, before we begin, we'd like to thank you all for coming out tonight. So, we've decided to whip up something extra special for you guys! A song!

Ready Manic?

Ready Sonia!

One...two...one, two, three, four!

_We're very unappreciated,_

_and to some we are considered hated!_

_But we are Sonic's siblings so cut us some slack,_

_and don't forget about us like Bean, Mighty and Nack!_

_We aren't canon, sure, but we should be in your_

_Fanfics to help our bro out cuz that's what we siblings are for!_

_And though we're just drums and keyboard without our bro on guitar,_

_we're here to help Sonic become the coolest by far!_

_We're here to help Sonic become the coolest by far!_

WOO! THANK YOU, MOBIUS! GOOD NIGHT!

Um...wait a minute. Did the readers actually HEAR that?

...

...

...

Well, dang it.

-Sonia and Manic

P.S.: Well...our lyrics were good, right?


	28. From: Omochao

Hello! I am OMOCHAO!

Welcome to Fanfiction!

To find a story, go on the Search Bar and type in a title, character, place, etc. to find what you're looking for! If you wish to find updated/relevant stories, click on the Advanced options for more settings!

To access a story, click on its Title; you may need to do so twice! Be careful!

To scroll up/down this page, use the Scroll Wheel on your mouse or click on the Scroll Bar to go up/down!

To review this story, go at the bottom of the page and click on the white box. Type in your review and then click Post Review! Many authors, especially this one, really like it when you do so! You can also click on the different check boxes to favorite or follow the story or author! Again, authors LOVE it when you do that!

Also, don't forget to press A to jump, use the Control Stick to move around, and the Y Button to turn on the Whitestone Detector!

-Omochao

P.S.: Did you know the Doctor's moustache is fake? (RIGHT IN THE CHILDHOOD!)


	29. From: Vanilla

Hmm...I do believe Random Person and a couple of others thought up this idea. So...you know.

* * *

Hmph!

I cannot BELIEVE you "fans" have such nerve to call me a terrible mother! Why don't YOU try to keep up with a stubborn, six-year-old cotton-headed-ninny-muggins all hours of the day? Accepting random flowers from her, having to hear her Chao repeat the same five noises. All. The. TIME! And BEFORE you pull the Dora's and/or Ash Ketchum's mom card on me and proclaim "You don't care about your daughter and let her roam off with a bunch of random teenagers that blow up robots, with one of them carrying around a machine gun and swearing like a sailor at a pub!" allow me to state the following...

I TRY!

I know some people who follow her around and record her every move for me, sending me back what they find! Also, GUN helps me out as well! To do so, I even have to go through methods of...bribery...

NO, Commander Tower! Get back in your cage! And I don't care if you haven't eaten in the past three days! Can't you see I'm in the middle of something?!

-Vanilla the Rabbit

P.S.: Oh, and I'm a rabbit. Not a cougar. So don't pair me with those wild hooligans Cream calls friends and-MR. TOWER! DON'T MAKE ME TAKE OUT THE ROLLING PIN AGAIN!


	30. From: Scourge

**_Okay...so. Carry the one...this character has been asked for 7 times. 7. TIMES. I do believe that may be the most requests for one character yet...and to think, I didn't know some people still read them comics! And if you're the proud owner of one of these reviews/messages requesting this guy for the 30th chapter, give yourself an imaginary cookie! Did you? Well, alright! OFF WE GO!_**

**_-BAA_**

* * *

The king has arrived, baby! Now where's my respect?

...Seriously. Where is it, Sonic and Co.? I'm the king! I *&!(?* EARNED that respect!

I mean, I'm lookin' at this "Fanfiction" here, and I'm all "But I hate that blue ?$ %^! I'm not in *!( *!( love with him!" As I keep readin', I wonder "Why the !*& am I doin' readin' this, anyway? Oh yeah! That blue ?& (# and his !* (#&$ friends sent me blackmail after mother*!)#*^? blackmail to do so! To write a % (#* & letter for # !*&(% kids!"

...

...Wait...kids?

...

Oh # $%.

-Scourge the Hedgehog

P.S.: God, this was for KIDS?! Why the %$*# didn't Sonic tell me?! Sonic...SONIC...you...YOU...

...DAMN IT! THE KIDS ARE STILL HERE!


	31. From: The Chaos Emeralds

_**Thanks to Random Person for yet another great idea! Geez, how many ideas of yours are there...? XD**_

_**Once again, thank you all for your support!**_

_**-BAA**_

* * *

God, we're tired.

Seriously. Try moving around literally EVERYWHERE. Not just to a different neighborhood, but different lands. Galaxies. Freakin' dimensions! Also, does EVERYONE has to put their grubby little mits all over us and call us "gods"?! It was just the other day that a red echidna was singing while doing some rain dance around Master Manny, a black hedgehog was crying with Ronny Red in his hands, a white bat couldn't stop kissing Becky Blue, and that fat guy sneezed on Yellow Yolanda! He SNEEZED on her; she's now an active germaphobe because of that!

So the next time a Sonic Fanfic is written, we BETTER be treated with respect, and not that white bat's type of respect neither...

-the seven Chaos Emeralds, who feel very violated...

P.S.: We have the power to kill people, but we can't. Anyone else think that's fair? We know we don't...


	32. From: Antoine and Bunnie

Happy Valentine's Day, readers! To celebrate Valentine's Day, I give to thee a letter from an actually canon Sonic pairing...enjoy!

-BAA

* * *

Okay...

...

...

So...do you guys like us, or...?

-Antoine and Bunnie D'Coolette

P.S.: After seein' what happened to that there Chris and Elise, we seriously need ta know. This "Oh...I'm fine with y'all..." or "Oh, I'm content with y'all..." ain't gonna fly.

Zis is true.

Wait a minute...honey, ain't y'all s'posed ta be in a coma?

...

...Oh. Right.


	33. From: The Mane Six (MLP)

I've noticed this occuring MLP/Sonic crossover craze going on. And yes, I'm actually in love with Friendship is Magic; I wear a Rainbow Dash scarf everyday...with this letter, I couldn't help myself. *shrug* Enjoy!

-BAA

* * *

Well, hello! ...Sonic fans.

A-Anyway, it's cool that so many of you like us...hanging out with Sonic...not like the fat guy with them continually destroys Equestria or anything...

Um, don't get us wrong or anything! We love Sonic and his friends, even though they just use all our stuff without or consent and one of them just won't stop swearing and shooting random ponies when we're trying to run a kid's show around here...even though forty-year-old men tend to...uh...watch our show...

B-But that's not important right now! This is about Sonic! Yeah! W-We love Sonic! Rainbow Dash even named her signature move, the Sonic Rainboom, after Sonic!

No, I didn't!

SHUT UP, RAINBOW DASH!

Don't tell ME to shut up!

SHUT UP!

No, you shut up!

You shut up!

No you!

You!

YOU!

Anyone know where the honey buns are?

PINKIE PIE!

What? I really want one...

-The Mane Five (Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Pinklie Pie, Apple Jack, and Rarity)

P.S.: Derp!

...When did Derpy get here?

I dunno...she just...came...

HERP DERP!

...Now would be a good time to leave...

Yeah...

HERPY DERP DERP!


	34. From: The Round Table Knights

**_Yes, I changed the name of Dear Fanfiction-Sonic Edition to Sonic's Letters. There's another Fanfic out there with the same name but was written before mine, so I changed the name of mine. I apologize if there was any confusion when separating the two Fanfics from each other and I did not mean to steal any ideas from that Fanfic. I still hope you enjoy Sonic's Letters all the same. :)_**

**_-BAA_**

**_P.S. 1: Thanks to Slick the Wolf for the idea of these guys!_**

**_P.S. 2: I don't have a PS2, actually. So...yeah._**

* * *

Good evening, citizens.

Thy art most pleased with the fruit of thy imagination...to an extent.

Thy understandeth so that our creation in the game "Sonic and thy Black Knight" can be considered an "Alternate Universe" created by SEGA, but there are times we hath found thee "Alternate Universe" stories thou hath created, and we at times are filled to thy brims with limitless confusion. Our counterparts need not education, but rather must saveth thy world from destruction. Also, we hath come across thy princesses thou calleth "Mary-Sues" are too perfect for thy world. Why mustheth they succumb to such flawlessness and become the idols of eternal love to our male counterparts? Tis madness!

Utter madness!

But yeah, those stories that make us along with the real Sonic and his friends look awesome are pretty sick. Nice job, homies.

-the Knights of the Round Table (Sir Lancelot, Percival, Gawain, among others)

(P.S. from author: I went for a Shakespeare-esque way of the knights talking. I'm not that great with writing like that, but I still hoped you guys enjoyed it. :D)


	35. From: Shahra

**_Wow! We're nearing 300 reviews! (Not counting mine. By the way, sorry for forgetting about Fluttershy...wow. I'm so ashamed...*facepalm*) ANYWAY!_**

**_Gosh, I wish I can remember who requested this character, but thanks for the one who did! Also, thanks for the readers, reviewers, and everyone in between! :)_**

**_-BAA_**

* * *

****Do not be alarmed! It is only I, Shahra, the Genie of the Ring!

I may grant you three wishes!

And PLEEEASE, don't wish for a mountain of handkerchiefs. Don't...seriously.

Seriously, what was THAT all about? Was Sonic mad at me for testing his ability to swim? CAN'T he swim? I thought he could. Hedgehogs CAN swim, after all. So can cats! Hey, cats are fun! Videos of cats are cool too! Why, I just saw one the other day where one was dressed like Mario, and...oh. Right. The whole wishes thing.

You got your three wishes, yet? Oh, you want eternal glory? Ha! Sorry! Want a carpet instead? No? Well...wish to live through a real-life high school summer reading book? ...No?

...

Well, hope you like handkerchiefs.

-Shahra the Ring Genie

P.S.: Can't YOU swim?


	36. From: The Biolizard

**_And THIS is what happens when inspiration for all other characters runs on empty at the moment and you write this at some odd hour in the morning! Nonetheless, enjoy!_**

**_-BAA_**

**_P.S.: A new poll is up on my profile about my new Fanfic, Speed of Sue. I'd really appreciate it if readers of the parody can tell me what they think! Other than that...yeah! On with the show!_**

* * *

_BIOLIZARD TRANSLATOR: ON_

Dearest Fanfiction,

GWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!

_I was the ultimate life-form BEFORE it was cool! I'M SO HIP!_

GWAAAAAAAAAAAAR,

_Chaos and destruction to all,_

-Biolizard

P.S.: GWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAR!

_You better believe it, OR I WILL KILL YOU! Though I'm dead, I'll find a way!_


	37. From: The Supers

300 reviews, guys! WOO! I'd love to thank everyone who has reviewed, and I'd like to give a shout-out to Random Person for being the 300th reviewer! Yay!

-BAA

P.S.: Once again, thanks Slick the Wolf for this idea!

And another P.S.: I posted up a new one-shot/Crack Fic called "I Gotz the DONUTS!" to celebrate 4Kids' wonderful English dubbing; it's Pokemon, but I think it turned out pretty decent...enjoy!

* * *

Well, hey. You bowing yet? Good.

As you are, allow us to address a couple of things.

First off, you...DO realize that we need the Chaos Emeralds to become super...right? We can't really summon them at will, neither. As much as Super Smash Brothers Brawl wants you to believe we can...we can't. That's not a reliable source, you know. We have you know that Solid Snake and Sonic met up to go see _The Hobbit _recently, so they ARE friends. It was just a conspiracy Master Hand paid Otacon and Solid Snake to start, but we digress.

Second, we're not gods. Like the Master Emerald isn't...even though it's been quite angry at Knuckles lately for saying so; it's been raining there for the past thirty seven letters.

And finally, there are some characters that don't have Super forms. Amy, Cream, Big, Rouge, Omega, the Chaotix, Marine, the Babylon Rogues and many others. There are only, like, seven of us who can. And yes, they HAVE sent a petition to SEGA demanding them the ability to go Super. Seventeen of them, to be exact.

Wait...have you stopped bowing? WELL? HAVE YOU?!

...

Good. That's what we thought.

-the Supers (Super Sonic, Super Shadow, Turbo Tails, among others)

P.S.: Keep bowing or we'll turn you into our energy drinks. That's right. Up and down...up and down...


	38. From: Commander Towers

Hello, everyone!

Thanks to XxdarkangelknightxX for this idea!

-BAA

* * *

To anyone who's reading this...

Help me! This rabbit lady is out of her damn mind! She's been mumbling to herself, treating me like I'm some sort of...well, can't use animal...how about _zoo _animal? Yes, that's it! Anyway, she's freaking lost it! She's been giggling with bags under her eyes, saying "Cream cheese...cream cheese...always delicious on a bagel..." and speaking of which, that's all she's been feeding me! Bagels...either that or _nothing!_

One would think that some agents of mine would come and get me by now...I didn't write that letter from GUN after all...

And that's another thing, they...oh God, she's coming! Quick! Someone call the police!

Wait a minute...I AM the police! I can simply arrest her! But where's my gun?

...

...

Oh...um, heheh...hello, Miss Vanilla...where did you get that 40 Caliber?

-Commander Towers

P.S.: Will I get back in the cage? Oh, most certainly! Heheheh...*sobs*


	39. From: Eggman Nega

Alright...well, Blaze, if you honestly insist on me writing this-OUCH! Okay, okay, I'm writing it! Gosh! No need to flame!

Speaking of which children, flaming is not a good thing. It can hurt the feelings of many authors who actually try hard to write stories. Therefore, it's always a good idea to write a review in the kindest way possible, and if the story really is bad in your eyes, give proper explanations on what the author may do to better their stories and...wait. What am I supposed to be writing about again? I was distracted by that proposterous cat-girl. Oh, that's right. My compliments/complaints towards the Fanfiction writers considering me as a character.

Well...I...think your stories are...good? Frankly, I wouldn't know. This is actually my first time on Fanfiction and...uh...huh. Wow, where did my creative and impromptu writing ability go?

...Blaze? You think you could...you know...flame me again?

Sure. UR LETTR SUX. NEVR RITE AGAN AND GTFO.

That's not what I meant!

Well, not MY fault you weren't specific.

-Dr. Eggman...Nega

P.S.: Get back here, you stupid cat-girl!

Pfft! As if!

UR SO RIDICULUS!

Ouch! Flame!

THAT'S NOT FUNNY, CAT-GIRL!


	40. From: Mario (Yes Mario! Wahoo!)

**_You know, Random Person. You know._**

**_-BAA_**

**_P.S.: Speed of Sue-A Sonic Parody is now updated! Just sayin'._**

* * *

...

...

...

...Why do I keep winning against Sonic in races? N-Not like I'm complaining or anything, but you know. I never really liked physics, but even I don't thinking winning against a hedgehog like Sonic is logical. Sonic's been very insecure lately because of me always "beating" him in everything. Seriously. He's only fifteen; his emotions are still fragile. Give the guy a chance.

And I don't-a always-a talk-a like-a this-a. It's just not my style, ya know?

-Mario

P.S.: I might as well go ahead and ask to stop pairing me with Sonic, but he already asked that in the first chapter. Hmm...stop pairing me with Luigi. Or Bowser. Or Wario. Or Yoshi. What's so wrong with pairing me up with Peach and calling it a day? I save her all the time, so I oughta get...oh, this is rated T. Drat.


	41. From: Mina

Again: sorry for the delayed updates! I've just kinda tuned outta this story for a couple of days...

ANYWAY!

Thanks aliciathewolf45 for this idea!

-BAA

P.S.: Expect another update tonight to make up for missed updates; I may also update Sonic Legends: Cobalt, so keep an eye out! :)

* * *

WOOHOO! GOOD EVENING, MOBIUS! ARE YOU READY TO-

Wait...whaddya mean you've already seen a concert? W-What?! B-But I'M the main show here! Who else could've performed?

..."Sonic Underground"? Who the hey are "Sonic Underground"?

Oh...Sonic's bro and sis named Manic and Sonia? Uh...wait. Aren't those the names of his children, like, thirty years from now? ...Yes. I've read those comics. Yeah, how I'm married with Tails, a guy I know as much as Shadow knows Amy, and I have this awkward haircut...so...am I supposed to sing something? Ash told me that it would be a full house...and...ASH! QUIT FLIRTING WITH THE FANGIRLS! They're not YOUR fans; no one knows who YOU are...

They're probably, like, Shadow's or something. He has more fangirls than anyone else here, right?

...Sorry, Silver.

-Mina Mongoose

P.S.: Ooooh! I thought of the PERFECT idea! I can sing about Shadow and his fangirls! And maybe...WHADDYA MEAN I'M OUTTA TIME?! Gah, this is all your fault, Nicole!

...What? Got no one else to blame. And after a couple of issues...I mean, letters...we'll make up! Yep! It always works out over here in Mobius, where there are peaches and cream and rainbows and happiness and nothing will EVER kill us all!


	42. From: Tails Doll

Yep! Here's the other update for yet another highly requested character! Quite a few to list...:)

-BAA

* * *

Oh...hello...would you like to play?

Yes...play...play...with me...

What? You think I'm a monster? Oh, how naive of you! I'm merely a defenseless, sweet little doll who loves to play...play...

Oh! Look! Here's my dear friend Tails!

G-Get away from me, you devil spawn!

Hee...hee...come, Tails...do you not want to play with your friends?

YOU. ARE. NOT. MY. FRIEND!

Hee...hee...ha...ha...

Tails Doll! G-Get away!

HA...HA...HEE...HEE...

-Tails Doll

P.S.: NO! I DON'T WANNA PLAY WITH YOU! GET AWAY!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA...come and play...with your favorite toy...come on, Tails, be a good little boy...

Gosh, what can make you ANY creepier than what you already are?!

I...am...happy...

...Did you seriously just quote Gigyas from EarthBound?

Creepiness and all, my child...

...God.


	43. From: The Wisps and Chao(s)

_Hey howdy hey, guys!_

_Thanks for the reviews, along with 30 favorites! WOW! You guys are the best!_

_Hope you keep enjoying!_

_-BAA_

_P.S.: Thanks to Random Person for this idea!_

* * *

Hi Fanfiction! Glad to meet you!

Ha! We are just SOOOO adorable, aren't we?

Haha...don't answer that. We know we're adorable.

ANYWAY! Let's get down to business!

You haven't forgotten of our existence, right? You know, we're those multi-colored flying things with the wings and stuff? Yeah! We're those! And we might as well throw out there that we can't speak English! The only way we're talking to you right now in this particular language is by using that fox's translator that he used for those aliens. Speaking of which...

Hey, look! It's the Wisps! Hi guys! Gee, this translator works AWESOMELY, doesn't it?

You're telling us! We'd literally be used as theme park attractions without them! Speaking of eight-year-old foxes, have you seen the creator of the translator anywhere?

Hmm...last time we checked, he was running from a floating doll that looked just like him...hey, is that him running in the distance screaming like a banshee?

Believe so!

Should we...help him?

Nah...cookies?

Oooh! Don't mind if we do!

-the Wisps and...Chaos? Chaoi...chaoses...chao...

P.S.: Mmm...these cookies are good...

What's that doll doing to Tails? Looks like he's strangling him in a hug.

AWWWW! How nice of that doll!

You aren't kidding!


	44. From: Classic Sonic

**And THIS is what happens once one remebers their first Sonic game and decides to pay homage to the classics! (Though reference to CD is made, my first Sonic game was actually Sonic the Hedgehog 2. The more you know, the more places you'll go!)**

**-BAA**

**P.S.: Updated SL: Cobalt yesterday! WOOT!**

* * *

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

-Classic Sonic

P.S.: ...

...

...

...

_THREE MINUTES OF STARING BLANKLY AT THE SCREEN LATER..._

I'm not pudgy. I'm squishy. *jumps off ledge*


	45. From: Shade (NOT THE OC!)

Welp, I was wrong! THIS, I believe, is the longest letter! (And one of the funnest to write so far!) XD

Enjoy!

-BAA

P.S.: Thanks to RubyHedgie for this idea!

* * *

My, my, MY! How CREATIVE you all are!

So. Tell me...did you so happen to detect the very note of sarcasm in my voice?

Well then! Let me get to the point here! So, once I heard that we were all going to be writing some letters, I decided to go and do some research on Fanfiction to see if there's anything I have worth saying. Well, at first I was really excited to see that my name was mentioned a lot in the summaries...

Then I read the Fanfics.

My most recent reaction has gone as follows:

"Once, there was a young girl named Shade."

Oh boy! A Fanfic? About ME?! WOW!

"She was fifteen, and she had long red hair..."

Ha! I do indeed!

"And an hourglass figure along with big boobs."

Um...cool?

"She wore black leggings and had black streaks in her hair, with black fishnets, and a short black shirt that showed off her clevage."

...O...kay...?

"One day, she was walking through the park, where she met her future lover...Shadow the Hedgehog!"

o_O

"The two crossed paths, and once they did, they had several kawaii moments, later on making out and...doing other things..."

...WTF?!

"They later on got married and had several children."

WTFWTFWTFWTFWTFWTFWTFWTF?!

"And Shadow realized that Shade was the most beautiful hedgehog he ever laid eyes on. Then they grew old and died. The end."

...Thank. God.

Wait a minute...they're all like this! They're all hedgehogs! And in love with SHADOW! ALL OF THEM! Why are they all named Shade?!

T-That's it! I'm changing my name to something random...from Shade...to...to...

-Julie-Su the Echidna

P.S.: Ha! There! No one can copy THAT! ...Right?

OW! Who just punched me?!

...Hey! Pink-haired girl! GET BACK HERE!


	46. From: Dr Robotnik (NOT Eggman!)

Hello, moronic reader.

I suppose you noticed who has sent this letter, right? Good! You better. Why? Well...let's not forget that I am only THE Dr. Robotnik, the ORIGINAL one. You know, the one you always called a walrus? The one who ran funny? The one who built his own Star-Wars-esque base in SPAAAAAAACE?! Yes! Yes, that's me! None of this "Eggman" business.

No, no, no. Rather, this "Eggman" is what you children call a "poser" of me. He decided to make his last name "Robotnik" because he wanted to seem distinguished from all the other villains and try to be special. He is, however, doing a terrible job trying to be more evil than ME. Honestly, do YOU think that turning your worst enemy into a "werehog" is a good idea?

I will give him this, though. He's persistent, to that blue hedgehog's delight. Speaking of which, it's best to mention that I'm still at an attempt to properly dispose of him. Notice how I said "properly". It's taking me quite some time to do so...yes...that's why I always lose...right...

Anywho, may thou be at thy mercy. Eggman, I'm staring at you.

Yes.

YOU.

And before you think twice, dear "Eggman", remember who can actually OUTRUN Sonic.

Mmm hmm. I'll give you a head-start by a count of ten. One...two...

-Dr. Robotnik (And none of this "Eggman" hugabaloo...)

P.S.: Ah, you've already started running, eh? That's what you get for being a poser, Mr. Ivo!

Oh, and how exactly can I talk? Well, I'm OBVIOUSLY smarter than who you refer to as "Classic Sonic". Honestly, though, WHY all these terms? You're making this intellectual's brain hurt.


	47. From: Erazor Djinn

**_Thanks to ol' Slick for this idea! :)_**

**_-BAA_**

* * *

Yet another villain to face the wrath of the mortals, hmm? Great...

Well, I don't have much to say to you idiotic mortals besides stop with the "Eraser Djinn" joke along with "Sharpener the Ruler Genie". I get that we're in a world based on a high school summer reading book...but...really? Do you HAVE to bring up the fact that my name sounds like a school supply? It is NOT inspired by a school supply, I tell you! I'm evil! Powerful! And...and...

*does research on Sonic trivia*

My name is a pun on "eraser"...AND "razor"?! All high-schoolers have those! So...am I just a high-school pun?!

...

...Oh! Silver the Hedgehog was originally supposed to be a mink? I didn't know that!

-Erazor Djinn

P.S.: And Shadow once did break-dancing in a Japanese commercial? OMGLOLROTFLLMFAO!


	48. From: Fiona

**_So...many...requests...GAH! Here's the letter! Take it! Take it already!_**

**_-BAA_**

**_P.S.: As always, thanks for all the support! (Bet you guys get tired from hearing that, but it really does mean a lot.) :)_**

**_Another P.S.: Is it just me, or are these letters getting longer? Anyone remember when these letters were less than a hundred words? ._._**

* * *

Well. You're all just as great and goody-two-shoed as I suspected...

Repulsive.

How can you possibly LIVE with yourselves? Not robbing, fighting, back-stabbing, any of that?! That's what makes life worth living!

Lemme tell you what life is REALLY all about...

_WARNING: BAA DOES NOT SUPPORT THE VIEWS OF FIONA FOX IN ANY WAY, SHAPE OR FORM, AND DISAGREES WITH THE FOLLOWING STATEMENTS:_

It's all about breaking the law, vandalizing, blowing up everything in your path, stealth, defying all authority, back-stab people that mean the most to you, and best of all, do it all with your boyfriend, whom most consider a pervert, tramp, or whatever else!

_THE AUTHOR ALSO WISHES TO STATE THAT FIONA FOX WAS ACTUALLY NOT SUPPOSED TO WRITE A LETTER. SHE (FIONA) JUST CAME HERE UNINVITED AND NO EXPLANATION. WELL...IF YOU DON'T COUNT HOW SHE (BAA) WAS HELD AT GUNPOINT AND WAS GOING TO HAVE HER PRECIOUS BRAIN EXPLODE IF SHE (AGAIN, BAA) DIDN'T LET FIONA WRITE A COOLER AND AWESOMER LETTER THAN THE OTHER 47 PEOPLE WHO HAVE._

_THAT, AND PEOPLE REALLY WANTED HER TO. SO YEAH._

-Fiona Fox

P.S.: In case if you were wondering, I was Scourge's censor a couple of letters back!

_THE FOX LIES. IT TOOK BAA HALF AN HOUR TO WRITE THAT LETTER BECAUSE HER COMPUTER KEPT MESSING UP THE TYPING._

I didn't want to, though! That mean BAA forced me to do it! Damn authority!

_I...SHE DID NOT! AND AUTHORITY IS NOT STUPID! DRUGS ARE ALSO UNCOOL AND KIDDOS SHOULD BRUSH THEIR TEETH THREE TIMES A DAY! _

_AND BAA IS NOT MEAN! SHE RECENTLY HELD THE DOOR OPEN FOR AN OLD LADY AT A FANCY RESTAURANT AND USED GOOD TABLE MANNERS!_

I'm telling you! These people are trying to take away ALL of our rights, including the rights of my dear boyfriend's freedom of speech!

_CHILDREN COULD BE READING THIS THOUGH! THEY DON'T NEED TO LEARN ABOUT-HEY, WHERE DID YOU GET THAT BASEBALL BAT FR_

...

A nice blonde girl gave it to me, "BAA". She told me to use it well against any human girl that I found "stupid" towards the Sonic gang. And...well...I think I helped her with that mission.

Well, guess it's time to spread more ruckus across the land! Later...losers.

..._UNH..._


	49. From: Every Other Anthromorph Out There

**_Once again, thanks to aliciathewolf45 for the idea contribution!_**

**_-BAA_**

**_P.S.: There will be a double update later! Get stoked! Get pumped! It'll be the best one yet!_**

* * *

Dear Fanfiction...

We.

Are.

Not.

SONIC CHARACTERS!

Just because we're anthromorphs, does NOT mean we're Sonic characters! Geez, why does EVERYONE out there think that we have some sorta relationship with the Blue Blur just because we're animals too?!

Are we posers in your eyes? Yeah! Probably! But it's not our fault! It's our developers'! Nintendo, and...uh...those other guys...were the guys that made us! And if we weren't created, then we wouldn't be in this mess, now would we? Wait...we wouldn't even exist...um...

Uh...well, we barely even KNOW Sonic. So...wow, this is a terrible argument we're making, huh?

Wait, Fox, whaddya mean that you met Sonic at the Smashers Mansion? I-Impossible! There's no way any of us can know Sonic! That would ruin this whole debate even though it was already kinda one-sided! Wait...Falco and Wolf know him, too?!

...

...

Quick! Kill them before they breed and ruin EVERYTHING!

-Sly Cooper, Klonoa, Crash Bandicoot...among MANY others...

P.S.: H-Hey guys! I'm here for the...wait...who are you guys?

...What's the yellow pony doing here?

Well, R-Rainbow Dash and the others t-told me they were going to be writing a...a letter and...who's the fox laying on the ground twitching?

...Quick! Kill the pony before she goes ratting us out!

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!


	50. From: EVERYONE (Seriously Everyone)

**_Thanks to Jennifer White for this idea for..._**

**_..._**

**_...Hey! I found my drums at Rainbow Emerald High! So...drumroll..._**

**_..._**

**_..._**

**_DA BESTEST (AND NOW EASILY LONGEST) LETR EVA!_**

**_Enjoy, compadres, amigos, amies, and whatever else!_**

**_-BAA_**

* * *

Good evening, Mobius!

I'm Sasha Cat from Channel 7 News, and we're coming to you live from Sonia and Manic's concert, where people are gettin' an encore! Woo, does it rock!

_We're very unappreciated...ladelalalalala..._

Wait...hold on...looks like someone's barging onto the stage! It's...it's Mina Mongoose!

She's fighting with the two hedgehogs...and now SHE'S starting to sing! Man! She sounds pretty good, too!

_Shadow's fangirls are everywhere,_

_they are hanging 'round Fanfiction writing some stuff_

_about him and their OCs doing everythang,_

_with the name of their OC most likely being Shade!_

Sonia and Manic seem to like it! But wait! Now a red echidna's barging on the stage! She looks mad about something...and is holding some type of paper to the audience! Is that some type of copyright infringement lawsuit? Oh wait...looks like she's being chased off by some pink echidna...darn, I wonder what was up with that! Oh, and there's Knuckles!

Ladies, ladies! Get back here! Where's that flirtatious one-shot I was promised?

Mina looks stumped. She has no idea what to sing now! Gosh I hope she figures something out...oh dear! The microphone's been snatched again! This time by...oh my, I can't see...

Someone! Anyone! Help me! I'M BEING HELD HOSTAGE BY THIS CRAZY PSYCHO!

Bagels...bagels...always good with cream cheese...

GAH! GET AWAY FROM ME YOU #$!*%? ...Oh wow! That green hedgehog's right! This censor's fantastic! ...Oh no! She's gotten faster!

C'mon, Commander! Have a bagel...

NO!

Um...uh...viewers, I have no idea what's going on at this point...

M-Mommy? What're you doing...?

Oh...uh...Cream! Nothing! I was just...

You're chasing that old man, aren't you? God damnit, mom! You're so damn clingy with every damn person you damn meet, and what the hell is up with all this "bagels" crap?! You're annoying the hell outta me and Cheese and we're both sick of it!

...What did you just say?

...

...I'll go get the soap.

...Um...viewers at home...please don't ask any...why sure, Yakker! I'd love a cookie! Hmm...*munch*...I wonder what's happening to Tails over there? Is he getting tackled by some type of...voodoo doll? What's that, Random Chao #3? He's just giving Tails a hug while making awkward EarthBound references? Oh. Seems legit!

He's not the ONLY one who makes EarthBound references around here!

Oh! Princess Sally! What're you-

Sally! No! Please! I-I was just kidding about Sonikku not liking y-*slam*

Too late, Amy. *leafes pages of graphic novels* Too. Late.

Um...Princess? Was that...necessary?

Yes. Yes it was.

Oh. Alright. Well then, I...um...Mega Man?

No talk, lady! I heard that Dr. Wily was on the prowl!

I told you! I'm not this "Dr. Wily" character! My name is Gerald! Gerald Robotnik!

And it's-a me, Mario!

...Go away.

Yes, Professor.

GWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAR!

Wait...Biolizard?! But...but you're supposed to be dead!

Yeah. So are you, the blonde girl, and the rest of us, old geizer. But if I were you, I wouldn't complain. Even though these dear "fans" think that this whole "canon death" thing is just another way of saying "Don't let this stop you from going as far away from the Sonic storyline as you possibly can!"

So...how are we here again?

Eh. We dunno. No idea.

...I give up at this point.

NOOOOOOOOO! Get away from me, Espio!

I told you, Vector! That was a joke! I really don't make baby penguins get surrounded by leapord seals during nuclear explosions!

That's what all the serial killers say!

...No they don't, Vector.

Says you! I've seen enough of Criminal Minds to know what path you've taken!

Ugh. Charmy, help me out here.

o!*& #ihbsi*uwip(u& oi#ughoi u#i{) *#)(o*yt up( &#uolkjgqheidgcuhjup(wwuipwioyd()#*e(&

Like that, Espio?

Never mind.

Just to remind the folks at home, this is all happening on-stage. Just throwin' that out there.

froggy! froggy! wear r u, froggy? froggy! ...xuse mee sir, hav u ceen froggy?

No, pathetic earthling. Now, care to hear a story about the destruction of humanity along with the mass murder of thousands of civilians as I and my clan trample everything in our paths?

hmm...nah. i wanna feyend froggy.

Oooh! Mephiles the Dark wants to hear your story, Mr. Black Doom, sir!

Yeah! Nazo the fan-developed character would like to as well!

...Okay! Get some marshmallows and chocolate for Uncle Doom and we can get started!

OMGYAY!

Not too sure how the bad guys got here, but I suppose that's all up for you to decide, viewers!

For the love of GOD, Wave! Turn. THAT. OFF!

I can't help it, Jet! Tractors are sexy!

Um...uh...um...

Seriously, Storm? You still have NOTHING to say?!

Sorry, boss! I've been in a Thinker's Block.

I know how you feel, random albatross I've never met before. I had a really good speech going for me, and then-OW! Stop that, you stupid purple cat girl!

FLAMED! WHAT!

Grrrr! Sorry, random albatross. I'll be needing this board...*flies away*

HEY! *runs after the board* THAT BROACH NEGA STOLE MY BOARD!

Wow, that was close from getting censored.

BY COMMUNISTS!

Oh, will you shut up about that letter?!

...Aren't you supposed to be in a coma, BAA?

Like moi!

Stay outta this, French lover-boy.

DON'T Y'ALL TALK TO MY HUSBAND THAT WAY!

Oh yeah? And what're "y'all" gonna do about...OW! B-Blonde girl, can I use your bat?

Using it! For...uh...something important! *aims bat at Elise's head* Alright, now. Any last words?

Um...yeah, actually.

Okay. What are they?

I think I got rabies from Sonic. I never did get a vaccine.

Sucks for you, huh?

Yeah...anyway, *ties blindfold around head* let 'er rip.

So, I guess this is murder night, too!

Oh, Sonic! Can't you swim?

...

Not talking much today, huh?

...

...Sonic?

You...DO realize he is unable to talk, right?

Oh! Really? Well that's...um...wait, is it just me, or were you like, a LOT taller?

Well, I'm "Classic" Eggman. Classic characters are shorter. Proven fact, odd pink-haired floating person. Oh, look, another awkward pink-haired floating person. He's buff too. And purple. Just what ARE kids doing to themselves, these days?

Sharpner! I-I mean, Shahra! Run away with me!

Ewww! Go away Eras...Erazor!

Did you know that Sonic's first game wasn't a Sonic game? I know I didn't!

...Okay, really, WTF.

...My head's not a pot-leaf...

Hate ta break it to ya mate, but it is and...SPELL CHECK! What did we just talk about, mate?!

Hey...did you hear that?

Hear what, Silva?

A stampede...of ponies...and gunshots...

Hmm...gunshots, huh? Well, I sure have no idea! *starts playing All Hail Shadow as ponies scamper across stage*

AH! Run, ponies! RUN!

I still don't have my honey bun!

PINKIE PIE!

WHAT?!

THAT HEDGEHOG'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU!

*gasp* EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! *machine gun goes off*

WOOHOO! Shooting ponies shall never get old for THIS hedgehog! Dance, ponies! DANCE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

...

...Oh. So it was SHADOW that was shooting at all those ponies!

...Wow, Silva. *sigh* Wow.

Where did the...never mind.

Doctor, can you PLEASE get Cubot's voice chip fixed?

Boy howdy! This sure be a hoe-down goin' on right here!

Hmm...maybe not today, Orbot.

WHAT?! BUT I'VE HAD TO PUT UP WITH HIM FOR YEARS NOW! HOW IN ANY WAY IN THIS WORLD DO YOU EXPECT ME TO LIVE WITH HIM FOR ONE! MORE! DAY?!

Um...uh...you handle this, Metal Sonic.

_Blood is red, my target is blue_

_if you were Sonic, I would surely kill you._

...*quiet sobs*

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAW!

Oh, PLEASE tell me we're almost out of time...

You killed my brother!

Wait...killed your brother? I dunno what you're talking about, little robot!

...Who are you?

I'm Nack! Nack the Weasel!

And I'm Bean!

And I'm Mighty!

And I'm Ray!

...Nope, don't ring a bell.

*sulks* Didn't think so...

So...we're NOT almost out of time, then?

GET THEM!

Gah, that Sly Cooper's a fast one, huh, O'Donnell?

Sure is McCloud...hey, where did Falco go?

_In a dark corner of the stage..._

Heh...so Rayne...

It's Rouge.

Right, right. Anyway, I do a lot of flyin' 'round the world and all, but I don't think I've ever seen a gal as sexy and bodacious as you...

My eyes are up here, Falco.

Huh? W-What? Sorry I zoned out and...uh...

THIS MEATBAG CAUSING YOU TROUBLE, ROUGE?

Hmm...not at the moment, Omega-dear. I'll let you know otherwise...

1011010101110101001010101010 101110110101000101101011

Um...what did that robot just say?

Well, feathers, he said "try to touch her, and you die".

WHAT?!

Well, that's the censored version of it, anyway.

...Hey Fox! Wolf! Wait up!

Wait...look! There's Sonic! ...Beating a child?

Ow! OW! S-Sonic! QUIT IT!

NEVER!

Um...Sonic? What're you doing?

Showing this stupid kid Chris what for!

Sonic! PLEASE!

NEVER, YOU ONE-DIMENSIONAL CLONE OF SORA!

Oh...just...what is this? Honestly. *sigh* Anyway, until next time, I'm Sasha Cat from Channel 7 Ne-OW! SONIC!

Sorry! Sometimes I tend to miss my target on that homing attack. Don't ask how. I just do. Oh look, the moon and the Chaos Emeralds! I wonder if I can turn into a Werehog and go Super at the exact same time! Hmm...yes...I can feel a change...the seven Chaos Emeralds...I can feel their power...!

Oh God, why us? Wouldn't it be grand if the world could live WITHOUT the Emeralds for a change? Huh? Wouldn't it?

Yes! YES! YES! IT'S WORKING!

Mmmm...chocolate! All I ever talk about, really. Mmm...chocolate...

Oh no...I feel an overwhelming amount of energy! I'm getting too strong! I'm...I'm about to explode...! Ugh...UGH...UGH...

Um...Sonic? Are you-

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HH!

_KABOOM!_

* * *

**_The author sat back, wondering why and how she ended the Fanfic Sonic's Letters this way. It was probably the most random thing she ever wrote, not to mention the most abrupt. Seriously. In this entire letter, Mina stole the mike from Sonia and Manic, thus making a song about fangirls, MegaMan mistook Gerald for Dr. Wily, Shadow shot at innocent Equestrian ponies while Pinkie Pie had a sudden craving for honey buns, Falco hit on Rouge while Sly Cooper and the other anthromorphs chased around Fox and Wolf, and Sonic experienced an energy over-load, among several other things that were just too out there to list._**

**_She just wanted to tie all 49 letters in for one big finale. A big, random finale at that. And she admitted: it was sad to let it go. However, she knew that she had to move on. So, this chapter came. And the author's brain exploded when Fiona Fox got Maria's baseball bat and hit it against BAA's skull. The end._**

**_-BAA_**

**_P.S.: I'd love to thank you all so much for reading this unbelievably bizarre Fanfic, along with contributing ideas, input, jokes and whatnot. I'd like to thank the following people who reviewed, contributed ideas, and gave me support during the making of this Fanfic (in order of first review/s posted):_**

**_the14demons, zippylovesshadow, yesi owo, RetroManiac, Dimentio's Epic Girlfriend, pureflowersand2684, Random Person, aliciathewolf45, Connie the Hedgecat, EclipseWithTheMorphs, 1 fan o3o, Maon, Duskzilla, ERA OF ERICK, Silverflames16, Poetic Gamer, Chaotic hedgehog, xiXIToxicIXix, timeobserver2013, Ninuhuju, XxdarkangelknightxX, surveillent 314, KoopalingFan, RALF, Slick the Wolf, Jennifer White, MajorBalto243, Gamyie, Forgetmenot511, The Mirror's Wish, ThePokemonMage, Turbo, LeleB123, Idabadas, LunaTheDragonSlayer, Jeanette Volet, Heartless demon wolf, B4 Reviewer, Psycho Chick, Icy Fire 7, Lordofthehostking28, lydiathetigeropean, RubyHedgie, Depthsofthemind, WeAllHateElise, shamedwolf34, epicWiigamer, Mrs. Luigi Vargas, Industry 4, Everlasting Immortal Wolfy, anonymous, licorice, TheEighthLight, Maffman, ...Beyond an Anomaly..., IkarosMelan, Samus PWNS the Chief hard, ShadowsAngel1, MistyRuis, MyNoseAgreesWithMe, maniax300, character suggestion, urrfectChaos Ver.2.1.3975, CarnationPrincess, Sonadow fangirl 223, RoTheBomb, and Broken Line. (Along with some anon guests. If I forgot anyone, I apologize.)_**

**_Whether it was one review or twenty, you guys helped me out and encouraged me, giving me new ideas and making me feel better about this Fanfic; Sonic's Letter's wouldn't be the same without your ideas, used in this or not. And if I forgot to give credit to any ideas of yours, I apologize, but thanks for your help all the same._**

**_Thank you all for reading, readers from the very beginning or have just come across this whackadoodle work while browsing aimlessly. I hope that I will see you all again across the great cyber world of Fanfiction. Until then, keep calm and eat sushi donuts while playing invisible Pokemon with Solid Snake._**


End file.
